Monday, May 3, 2010

Deep Shock (2003)

Oh yes! After a week off, due to an unscheduled illness, it is time for a new bad movie review! Woo hoo! The other night Nancy brought a new movie to the movie marathon: Deep Shock (2003). Now when I saw this I thought to myself, "Self! This movie is either going to rock or stink up the joint! Hmm.. mead.." I mean, what's not to love? Sea monsters running amok! Mead sitting right there in the fridge! Life is good! Overall, the mead was tasty and the movie.. well.. at least there were 'esplositions! Lets get to it.

Deep in the arctic ocean, a US submarine is on patrol. Suddenly, a mysterious sonar blip gets a little friendly.. too friendly..

What the Deuce?!?!?

Soon it becomes apparent that a mysterious trench has formed in the arctic ocean floor. The United Nations meet with a group of scientists in order to discuss the ramifications of this event. Needless to say, the science is divided on the issue..

"Its natural (like my hair color)! Lets study it!"


"Its EVIL (like me)! Lets nuke it!"

Unlike the real United Nations, they decide to cowboy-up and drop a few nukes. Fortunately, the scientific research station just happens to have a few on board (yeah, I know. Who keeps nukes on a scientific research lab? Just go with it.). This attracts the attention of the locals...

"Howdy neighbor! What ya'll doing over there?"

..and the locals ain't havin' any!


Now a submarine crew is sent to the underwater station to investigate and complete the mission. They soon discover that an ancient species of underwater predator has awakened and threatens to destroy humanity! Oooh! Scary!!

"Lets get it on! Ooh.."

Yeah this movie has issues. (1) Apparently, the sea monsters are eels--not the dragon in The Never Ending Story. (2) What is the deal with "nuke first, ask questions later" scientific attitude? And (3) the sea monsters can shoot electricity to either destroy a ship or communicate via some electronic IM service. Come on.. make up your mind!

Still, this movie does have some good moments and the bad guy does pay the price for his nefarious ways in a truly satisfactory manner. Also the special effects are pretty good, overall. However, it does violate one of my main pet peeves: the cover art has nothing to do with the movie. All in all, it is worth a $.49 rental if you are avoiding productivity.

Rating: 2.5 Bites out of 5

-Safari Bob

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