Friday, March 19, 2010

The Gingerdead Man

Oh yeah! What can be more terrifying than a psychopathic killer reincarnated as ginger-based pastry and hell-bent on delicious revenge? Only one thing: That psychopath is portrayed by an obviously unhinged Gary Busey! God help us; God help us all!

While robbing a small Texas diner, Millard Findlemeyer (who comes up with these names?)--the flaky Gary Busey--unleashes a hail of tasty lead on the Leigh family. Sarah (the daughter) survives to testify against the half-baked Findlemeyer and send him to the electric chair. Mama Findlemeyer (an accomplished witch and baked-goods aficionado) serves up sweet revenge by mixing Findlemeyer's cremated remains into Gingerbread spices and delivers her spicy vengeance to the local bakery which is owned by the Leigh family. A quick mix, some time in the oven, and viola! a diminutive doughy dreadnought dispensing doom with a deadly dagger!

Whoa! This movie is bad! I know what you are thinking: What can go wrong? This is the role that Gary Busey was born to play! This movie has one flaw that is so distracting that one simply cannot enjoy the campy cookie-based killing: everyone could just leave the bakery. This takes place in a town... A TOWN! Why not just walk over to the police station? Why not walk over to Wal-Mart and get a baseball bat? The Gingerdead Man is all of 6" tall.. how fast can he walk?

Still, it does have its moments. Apparently, the Gingerdead Man is a master of the knife-based booby traps. Also, he likes to put icing all over young latina women (who doesn't?) along with strategically placed cherries and stick them in the freezer. Just remember: when the Gingerdead Man says "Eat me!" DON'T DO IT!

Rating: 1 Bite out of 5

-Safari Bob


  1. Where do you get these movies?!

  2. This one came from a video rental store that is closing. Sad really. Most of my collection comes from Amazon. Oh Amazon! How I love to hate myself the next morning after spending too much time in your nefarious movie offerings!