The Whisperer in Darkness (2011)

Oh yeah! It has been way too long since I had a chance to enjoy a good, bad movie. Yesterday Nancy and I sat down to watch The Whisperer in Darkness (2011). This is the latest movie adaptation of an H. P. Lovecraft tale from H. P. Lovecraft Historical Society (HPLHS) and is shot using their Mythoscope™ process — a mix of vintage and modern techniques. Nancy and I love the HPLHS adaptation of The Call of Cthulhu (2005) and we have been eagerly awaiting their new film. I am a big fan of H. P. Lovecraft and his work and this movie certainly does not disappoint. Lets get to the review!

Albert Wilmarth, a mild mannered professor of folklore at legendary Miskatonic University, discovers a hitherto unknown manuscript of 19th century collection of folklore from the remote Vermont mountains.

After losing a radio debate as to whether folklore depicts actual creatures, Professor Wilmarth is approached by a mysterious stranger with evidence that these creatures may exist.

"Say! Want to see some creepy pictures?"

Soon, Wilmarth travels to the wilds of Vermont to investigate the claims of strange beings around an old farm. Oh, and maybe some creepy alien monsters as well.

"Ever see a furtive look, Professor?"

After arriving at the farm in question, Wilmarth soon employs his academic research skills to determine that something just isn't right in the Green Mountain State!

"Ever see sinister brooding, Professor?"

Now its up to Wilmarth to investigate the strange happenings...

"Whoa! That aint Santa Claus!"

...and stop an alien invasion!

"Nom, nom, nom!"

I really enjoyed this movie. The Mythoscope™ process really adds to the overall creepy mood of the film and there are a few genuinely scary moments throughout. For the most part, the actors do a great job to convey this growing dread throughout the story and I thought the overall product faithfully captured the whole demeanor of H. P. Lovecraft. There are some problems with the special effects during an airplane scene, but the rest of the film is really well done. It is not cheap but if you enjoy H. P. Lovecraft, classic horror, or black and white movies, you should go to the HPLHS website and order a copy for you library. It is well worth owning a copy.

Rating: 4.5 Bites out of 5

-Safari Bob

Alien Apocalypse (2005)

Oh yes! It is time for another bad movie review and we are going to the king, Bruce Campbell! The other night, I decided to avoid the dissertation, poured myself a horn of home-brewed chocolate mead, and put Alien Apocalypse (2005) into the dvd player. You gotta love bad movies as a work avoidance tool.

As you know, O' Gentle Reader of Bad Blogs, Bruce Campbell is the king of bad movies and Burn Notice. I love his work, on the whole, and I have even read both of his books. Heck, Nancy even likes his movies and will occasionally put up with me watching some of his bad TV shows (which will remain nameless). In short, he is simply "The Man" around these parts. Now, lets get to the review.

A group of four astronauts return to earth after a 40 year cryogenic space nap only to discover that something is amiss.



Oops! Wrong film! Here we go...

"Say... where did we park?"

Soon, our intrepid hero discovers that modern civilization is destroyed and the human race has forgotten much of what it knew about medicine, technology and hygiene. Oh, also that the world has been conquered by giant space termites. Yeah, definitely giant space termites...

"Whoa! Where's Terminix when you need them?"

..and they are hungry...FOR BRAINS!!

"Nom, nom, nom, nom..."

Now, its up to "The Doctor" to lead a rag-tag band of humans (who are armed with primitive weapons)...

"Heigh-HO! Heigh-ho, its off to war we go!"

...against a deadly race of super space bugs (who are hell-bent on world domination, deforestation, and general nastiness)...

"WHERE'S THE CHEETOS?!?"

...and he ain't havin' any!

"Pew! Pew, pew, pew!"

Yeah, this movie has issues. First, the animation of the giant space termites was horrible. HORRIBLE! In fact, they kept using the same screen shots over, and over, and over. Next, Bruce Campbell is a space-faring chiropractor? Really? Last, the action is really slow for a "B Movie" adventure flick. I mean, come on! I'm wishing I would have worked on the diss, here!

Still, it does have its charms. For instance, it IS a Bruce Campbell film. Even though this is far from his best work, he does swagger and quip his way through the film (which was probably shot over 2 days or so) just like we like him to. I wouldn't buy or rent it, if I were you, but it may be worth watching on a Saturday afternoon Sci-Fi movie marathon if you are avoiding work.

Rating: 2 Bites out of 5

-Safari Bob